Titles. We cannot escape them. We are born with them as we become a son/daughter, sister or brother. We grow and gain new titles of friend, BFF, student, husband, wife, an ex, a parent, enemy, a sports fan, etc. It is overwhelming when we think about it as there are so many titles that we are given throughout our lives but do not really pay that much attention to them. In our careers, we apply for jobs by title and that match our skill set (or close enough). In so many aspects we are given the title except in areas of marketing, namely social media, there are the self-proclaimed titles.
Being Recognized
Being recognized is important. It validates us not only for who we are but for what we do. We all want to be recognized as it lets us know that we made a lasting impression and stood out in their minds. We have all been on the giving or receiving end of approaching/being approached with “remember me?” Blank stare with awkward few seconds of silence. We have to be careful when we say that we do not as we do not want to hurt feelings because they remember us and think that we should remember them. This is a tough one sometimes as they feel we should remember them for something they said, an article they wrote, a mutual connection and for us, it is completely off our radar.
Earning the Title Quietly
Titles that are earned quietly are the most rewarding, recognizable and lasting. The self proclaimed guru, ninja, expert, etc are trying to fit in and define themselves for what they think they are. Fitting in is a big part of who we are. The sense of belonging and being accepted is a contributing factor to how we feel about ourselves and how we treat others. If we feel we are part of something, we contribute to it and to the others. When we feel that we are being left out when we really should be included, we have to find a way to establish ourselves and our worth. For many, the self proclaimed title is born.
We want to be someone, something, someone who is influential, sets standards and boy oh boy that title is going to be it. It defines us and no matter what, we are going to throw it all out there and make it catch on. It never really does except in ridicule. Why? Because too many of them cannot sustain it. They cannot execute and live up to what they are self titling themselves as. Their credibility is scrutinized as you have to title yourself to be noticed? How about, I do not know, your name? The best of the best are the ones that never give themselves a bigger-than-who-they-are-title as they do not have to … we give it to them. They execute over and over and through that we identify them with their work. The proof is in their work and not their need to tell people who they are. Their title is earned quietly without a big ruckus or megaphone. We do not question their credibility and we remember them for what they are doing and tell people about them. It is a part of how and why they succeed.
Executing the Title
In social media not much is quiet and let’s face it we do not want it to be. We want to keep pushing it out there so that there is that gravitation to us. We want the readers, the commentators, the tweeters, the engagers and of course the clients/customers. We want to be noticed for what we do and who we are connected to. We seek out those who hold the same position as we do, cheer for the same team, the same thoughts and values and also mutual connections so we can learn from them, share stories and experiences. This is connectivity is so important as we need the socialization to grow personally and professionally. But at what costs to us?
Would you sell your soul for more followers which for some equates to acceptance? Would you call someone out online hiding behind your screen for that blog traffic when in person you would never say a damn thing to them? Most are reading this and shaking their head no but someone is doing it. All in the name of popularity. The battles we wage just to be someone we think we should be. We see others popping up out of nowhere and think we deserve to be there too. Out the window goes the strategy of hard work and growing at a pace to where we can actually talk with people and get to know them before are asking them to buy from us. Sure I know that people need money today and do not have time to wait but that instant gratification while it may pay the bills, it will not last. It cannot be sustained as ok now you are on the radar and people flood to you and tell you how great you are and hold on your every word until … your word is crap. Telling people you are a guru automatically starts them to shut down and not listen as who wants to hear from someone who is going to try and sell them on how great they are. It works much better when you show them.
Agree?
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